TEN THINGS I CAN'T LIVE WITHOUT AS A MINIMALIST

WHY AM I A MINIMALIST?

MEET A TRANS WOMAN MINIMALIST IN THE PHILIPPINES

MY TEN FAVORITE ZERO WASTE ALTERNATIVES

THE PRINCIPLE OF FIFTEEN

A friend of mine asked me, "How do you ensure that you have the right amount of clothing as a minimalist." I answered, "The Principle of Fifteen."

So how does this work? I created the Principle of Fifteen in 2016 when I fully embraced minimalism. Usually, I would do my laundry every two weeks. This means that I have already used 14 pieces of clothing, let's say 14 shirts, if I use one shirt per day. If I do the laundry after two weeks, it means I need at least 14 pieces for me to survive, with one more shirt on my body as I do the laundry. This makes it 15.

The principle is simple. For as long as I have 15 pieces of each kind... shirts, shorts, pants, underwear... I will survive.

This number is always on my head as I open my closet. The moment I see one type of clothing exceeding 15, I responsibly donate the rest.

Should I buy a new one, I simply remove one from the closet. One in, one out.

And I maintain fifteen.

NOTHING BEATS LOVE AT FIRST SIGHT EXCEPT LOVE WITH INSIGHT

In “One Woman’s Liberation,” Shirley Boone writes: “Talk about blind adoration! When Pat and I married, I was so much in love I didn’t have any sense at all. Pat has said in interviews that we married fully aware of the serious adjustments we’d have to make and the financial crises we’d face, but he was speaking strictly for himself. As far as I was concerned, I wasn’t aware of anything except that he was wonderful and that life without him would be miserable.

“I understood exactly how Mary, Queen of Scots, must have felt when she said of James Bothwell, her third husband, ‘I’d follow him to the ends of the earth in my petticoat,’ because that’s how I felt about Pat… If Pat had suggested it, I would have gone with him to Timbuktu without batting an eye. He was my life. To me, he was perfect, and that was the beginning of our troubles, because anyone placed on a pinnacle can go in only one direction: down.”

Shirley and Pat Boone worked through their differences to create a strong and lasting marriage, but the beginning of their true success as a couple came when they each recognized this cardinal truth: nobody’s perfect.

Reference: God’s Little Devotional Book for Couples. (2002). Manila, Philippines: Lighthouse Inspirational Books & Gifts.

LOVE IS BEING WILLING TO FACE THE RISKS OF SEEING YOUR SPOUSE’S DREAMS COME TRUE

In their book, “My Lover, My Friend”, Colleen and Louis Evans, Jr. write: “David and Nancy Low are one of the most exciting young couples we have met since coming to Washington. He is a financial lawyer, and she is a top flight public relations administrator…”

“After working in another state for a well-known and respected political leader, Nancy was offered a very high position in a federal government agency. This opportunity was made even more exciting by the fact that it had never before been offered to a woman. David felt the offer was a high honor and urged Nancy to accept it. He was confident he could find a job in his field in Washington. So, submitting to Nancy’s career potential, they pulled up stakes and settled here.”

“Some men would be threatened by this type of situation. If a man wanted to prove that he didn’t need other people, if he were an “emotional do-it-yourselfer,” then he might resist the emergence of his wife’s career, especially if it were an outstanding one. But David is a strong man, eager and able to become a servant to Nancy’s development. That is healthy ‘headship’ and management.”

Reference: God’s Little Devotional Book for Couples. (2002). Manila, Philippines: Lighthouse Inspirational Books & Gifts.

THE MOST IMPORTANT THING A FATHER CAN DO FOR HIS CHILDREN IS TO LOVE THEIR MOTHER

Washington Post columnist William Raspberry wrote a loving tribute to his wife, seemingly unaware that he was reflecting his own role in her success: “The second Sunday in May was not just Mother’s Day for our family – it was Mother’s Graduation Day, one of the great moments in our household.

“My wife, Sondra, was one of those ‘responsible’ young women who decided after high school to spare her family the economic burden of college and go directly to work. Then she got married, and her family became her first priority.

“I don’t know precisely what made her decide to go back to school… It wasn’t easy, studying parttime while managing the lives of a husband and three children…

“On graduation day, it was announced that she had been inducted into both the adult honor society and Phi Beta Kappa. The kids shrieked as though she had won the Nobel Prize for Smart Moms. Some people may have trouble understanding how we could get excited about something as routine as a bachelor’s degree. But if you have ever taken up something difficult and made a howling success of it, you’ll understand why we are so proud.”

Reference: God’s Little Devotional Book for Couples. (2002). Manila, Philippines: Lighthouse Inspirational Books & Gifts.

A PERSONAL RELATIONSHIP WITH JESUS CHRIST IS THE CORNERSTONE OF MARRIAGE

Marriage involves a blending of lives, not merely a “joining.” Many marriages flounder because the individuals in them keep looking back over their shoulders at freedoms and relationships they had in the past. When a couple invites Jesus Christ to be the cornerstone of their marriage as the true point of strength on which they build their relationship – they are inviting him to “walk out front” before them. Then he is free to lead them forward into the unique purpose He has for them as a married couple.

We are unique as individuals. But each marriage is also unique. It is as “individual” and one-of-a-kind as the two people involved. Just as God created us as completely original individuals, so we need to invite Him to create our marriages as completely original relationships. This can only happen when each person in the relationship yields his or her individuality to God’s higher purpose.

As C.S. Lewis said, “Self exists to be abdicated. In self-giving we touch a rhythm, not only of all creation, but of all being, for the Eternal Word also gives Himself in sacrifice.”  

Reference: God’s Little Devotional Book for Couples. (2002). Manila, Philippines: Lighthouse Inspirational Books & Gifts.

MY MINIMALIST WARDROBE

4 - Formal pants
4 - Jeans
1 - Jogging pants
7 - Shorts
5 - Pajamas
5 - Long sleeves
15 - Regular and muscle shirts
7 - Sweat shirts
2 - Formal coat
7 - Sweaters
2 - Barong attire
10 - Shawls
15 - Underwear
15 - Socks
15 - Hankies and face towels
15 - Sando shirts
2 - Neck ties
1 - Ribbon tie
1 - Belt
1 - Rubber shoes
1 - Black shoes
2 - Slippers
1 - Eyeglasses

Total = 136 items

Is this minimalist?

WHY AM I A MINIMALIST?

Credit card debt. That was the turning point. It was 2004 and I was faced with a debt amounting to 100,000 Philippine pesos or 2,000 USD. And every month, the interests and charges were making the situation worse.

Down on my knees praying to God for help, I cried and made one very high scream. And it made me realize that I was very tired of my situation. Too tired, that I slept on the carpet in my living room. When I woke up, I saw how beautiful the interiors of my house was, and how much I owned. And on one side, a vacuum cleaner which I have not touched for months.

"I haven't used it. Why?"

Reality bites. I was buying things to prove to myself and to others that I have possessions. And I would use the plastic card called credit card to buy it. Slowly, I reached for my wallet at the back of my jeans and saw the credit card in one of its pockets. HSBC. Issued in 2003. One year since I first used it, and I was in debt.

I got up from the carpet and my place revealed more things. And I uttered the words... freedom... space... time. As if somebody was whispering these words... freedom... space... time. I repeated it many times. Too many, that I couldn't count how many times I uttered it. 

It was what my heart was saying. Freedom... space... time... I was very sure about it. I long searched for it... freedom... space... time... 

2004 became the start of a journey. A journey which I later learned as minimalism. 

THE FAMILY BEGINS IN A COMMITMENT OF LOVE

If you were to hold a lump of dark green clay in one hand, and a lump of light green clay in the other, you could clearly identify the two shades of color. However, if you were to mold the two lumps together, kneading them thoroughly until they were truly blended, you would see just one lump of green clay… at least at first glance. Upon closer inspection, you could see the distinct and separate lines of dark and light green clay, yet it would be virtually impossible to separate the clay into two pure colors again.

That is an image of what it means for a husband and wife to become “one flesh” – love binds the couple together, especially as they knead out some of their differences and develop a life of mutual goals, activities, and relationship.

A grandma once told her young granddaughter that Jim and June were coming for a visit. With eager anticipation, they baked special treats and cleaned the house thoroughly in expectation of their overnight stay. With wide-eyed wonder the little girl exclaimed upon their arrival, “Nanna, there are two people. Someone came with Jim-and-June!” When the name of one is so readily associated with the other… the clay truly has been blended!

Reference: God’s Little Devotional Book for Couples. (2002). Manila, Philippines: Lighthouse Inspirational Books & Gifts.

THE POSITIVE LIFE

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BE PART OF THE VISION

What is the vision for your team? You’d be surprised how many individuals are part of a group that works together but isn’t clear about why. For example, that was the case when I became the leader of Skyline Church in the San Diego area. The church’s board was comprised of twelve people. When I asked each member to articulate the church’s vision the first time we met, I got eight different answers. A team can’t move forward in confidence if it has no compass!

As a member of your team, you need a clear understanding of its vision. If the team doesn’t have one, then help it to develop one. If the team has already found its compass and course, then you need to examine yourself in light of it to make sure there is a good match. If there isn’t, you and your teammates are going to be frustrated. And everyone will probably be best served by a change.

Ask your teammates to articulate your organization’s vision to make sure everyone is on the same page.

Reference:

Maxwell, J. C. (2007). Maximize your day: 365 days of insights to develop the leader within you and influence those around you. Manila, Philippines: OMF Literature Inc.

WORKING IN OBSCURITY

I think very highly of the importance of leadership. I guess that’s obvious for a guy whose motto is “Everything rises and falls on leadership.” Occasionally someone will ask me about how ego fits into the leadership equation. They’ll want to know what keeps a leader from having a huge ego. I think the answer lies in each leader’s pathway to leadership. If people paid their dues and gave their best in obscurity, ego is usually not a problem.

One of my favorite examples of this occurred in the life of Moses in the Old Testament. Though born a Hebrew, he lived a life of privilege in the palace of Egypt until he was forty years old. But after killing an Egyptian, he was exiled to the desert for forty years. There God used him as a shepherd and father, and after four decades of faithful service in obscurity, Moses was called to leadership. Scripture says by that time he was the most humble man in the world. Bill Purvis, the senior pastor of a large church in Columbus, Georgia, said, “If you do what you can, with what you have, where you are, then God won’t leave you where you are, and He will increase what you have.”

English novelist and poet Emily Bronte said, “If I could I would always work in silence and obscurity and let my efforts be known by their results.” Not everyone wants to be out of the spotlight as she did. But it’s important for a leader to learn to work in obscurity because it is a test of personal integrity. The key is being willing to do something because it matters, not because it will get you noticed.

Give your best regardless if anyone is watching.

Reference:

Maxwell, J. C. (2007). Maximize your day: 365 days of insights to develop the leader within you and influence those around you. Manila, Philippines: OMF Literature Inc.

KEEP YOUR EYES OFF THE MIRROR

The Big Picture Principle states, “The entire population of the world – with one minor exception – is composed of other people.” If you’ve never thought of life in those terms, then it’s time to give it a try. I’ve never met a person that truly wins with other people who has not mastered the ability to keep his eyes off the mirror and serve others with dignity.

I’m told that psychological research shows that people are better adjusted and more likely to feel content if they serve others. Serving others actually cultivates health and brings about happiness. People have instinctively known that for centuries – even before the science of psychology was formally developed. For example, look at the wisdom (and humor) found in this Chinese proverb:

If you want happiness for an hour – take a nap.

If you want happiness for a day – go fishing.

If you want happiness for a month – get married.

If you want happiness for a year – inherit a fortune.

If you want happiness for a lifetime – help others.

You can actually help yourself by helping others. Remember that, and it will help you take – and keep – your eyes off the mirror.

Open your eyes to the people around you and serve them well today.

Reference:

Maxwell, J. C. (2007). Maximize your day: 365 days of insights to develop the leader within you and influence those around you. Manila, Philippines: OMF Literature Inc.

INTEGRITY IS A HARD-WON ACHIEVEMENT

Integrity is not a given factor in everyone’s life. It is a result of self-discipline, inner trust, and a decision to be relentlessly honest in all situations in our lives. Unfortunately in today’s world, strength of character is a rare commodity. As a result, we have few contemporary models of integrity. Our culture has produced few enduring heroes, few models of virtue. We have become a nation of imitators, but there are a few leaders worth imitating.

The meaning of integrity has been eroded. Drop the word into conversations in Hollywood, on Wall Street, even on Main Street, and you’ll get blank stares in return. For most Americans, the word conjures up ideas of prudishness or narrow-mindedness. In an age when the meanings of words are manipulated, foundational values such as integrity can be pulverized overnight.

Integrity is antithethical to the spirit of our age. The overarching philosophy of life that guides our culture revolves around a materialistic, consumer mentality. The craving need of the moment supersedes consideration of values that have eternal significance.

Billy Graham said, “Integrity is the glue that holds our way of life together. We must constantly strive to keep our integrity intact.”

Are you willing to be a person of integrity at all costs?

Reference:

Maxwell, J. C. (2007). Maximize your day: 365 days of insights to develop the leader within you and influence those around you. Manila, Philippines: OMF Literature Inc.

SUCCEEDING WITH DIFFICULT PEOPLE

People working at the bottom of an organization usually have no choice concerning whom they work with. As a result, they often have to work with difficult people. In contrast, people at the top almost never have to work with difficult people because they get to choose who they work with. If someone they work with becomes difficult, they often let that person go or move him or her out.

For leaders in the middle, the road is different. They have some choice in the matter, but not complete control. They may not be able to get rid of difficult people, but they can often avoid working with them. But good leaders – ones who learn to lead up, across and down – find a way to succeed with people who are hard to work with. Why do they do it? Because it benefits the organization. How do they do it? They work at finding common ground and connect with them. And instead of putting these difficult people in their place, they try to put themselves in their place.

Connect with difficult people, and look for reasons to like and respect them.  

Reference:

Maxwell, J. C. (2007). Maximize your day: 365 days of insights to develop the leader within you and influence those around you. Manila, Philippines: OMF Literature Inc.

STOP TAKING YOURSELF TOO SERIOUSLY

In my seminars, I work with a lot of leaders. And I’ve found that many of them take themselves much too seriously. Of course, they’re not alone. I meet people in every walk of life who have too much doom and gloom in their attitudes. They need to lighten up. No matter how serious your work is, that’s no reason to take yourself seriously.

Most of us think that we are more important than we really are. On the day I die, one of my good pastor friends will give me a wonderful eulogy and tell funny stories about me, but twenty minutes later the most important thing he’ll have on his mind will be trying to find the potato salad at my reception.

You need to have a sense of humor about these things – especially if you work with people. Comedian Victor Borge summed it up: “Laughter is the shortest distance between two people.”

Take yourself less seriously and recognize that laughter breeds resilience.

Reference:

Maxwell, J. C. (2007). Maximize your day: 365 days of insights to develop the leader within you and influence those around you. Manila, Philippines: OMF Literature Inc.

COMMIT TO PAY THE PRICE FOR CHANGE

American dramatist and screenwriter Sidney Howard remarked, “One half of knowing what you want is knowing what you must give up before you get it.” Change always costs you something, if not monetarily, then in time, energy and creativity. In fact, if change doesn’t cost you anything, then it isn’t real change!

As you consider how to make the changes needed to improve and grow, it is important to measure the cost of change compared to the cost of the status quo. You have to do your homework. That often makes the difference between:

Change = Growth and Change = Grief

What will the changes you desire really cost you?

Management expert Tom Peters gives a perspective on this. He suggests, “Don’t rock the boat. Sink it and start over.” If you desire to be creative and do something really innovative, that’s sometimes what it takes. You must destroy the old to create something new. You cannot allow yourself to be paralyzed by the idea of change.

Is what you want worth what you must give up to get it?

Reference:

Maxwell, J. C. (2007). Maximize your day: 365 days of insights to develop the leader within you and influence those around you. Manila, Philippines: OMF Literature Inc.